MARFAM’S WEEKLY E-NEWSLETTER 20 AUGUST 2025

Education around the topic of human sexuality has been a topic of interest for me for very many years, from the time I was a catechist and my children were young.  At that point it had to do mainly with physical development and young people’s behaviour.   From our involvement through  Marriage Encounter and on into marriage ministry a much deeper understanding of sexuality evolved as a more intensely lived experience of love, a mirror and icon of God’s passionate, create, life-giving love.  Going further into family ministry, parenting as life-giving and later on even widowhood I came to understand better that we are all sexual beings, in fact from the moment of conception for the rest of our lives.  Our nature is sexual and male and female characteristics on all levels exist; physical – appearance, social- behaviour, psychological – thinking and behaviour , emotional – feelings and mood, spiritual – relationship with God and others. 

Still on a journey of discovery, most recently and since my greater involvement in creation as a whole, I have come to the realization that in fact sexuality is the life-force, God’s gift to creation to carry on the various species.    Clearly plants and some animals live out their sexuality at different levels of cognitive functioning,  but I’m particularly intrigued by the real loving relationship that do exist in animals.  I even picked up a very old book from way back in my school days called “Uit Oerwoud en Vlakte” which recounts an experience of life and death in a family of lions, killed by hunters.   

Human beings of course, are a higher life form one could say, and created in God’s image as male and female, so representing God’s image as a couple.  Pope Francis in Amoris Laetitia 10-11 and elsewhere follows the trend already begun in the 2nd Vatican Council and developed by other Popes in the last 60 years.  He also notes that we too frequently regard sexuality as an issue and a problem.   It is true that there are many issues and problems but the beauty and mystery of human sexuality can and should be explored and appreciated further and not just for the youth, or young married couples.   I have composed many prayer poems mostly before Chris’s death but also more recently.  


Father you did not create us to live alone
And as male and female you made us wonderfully different.   
Not to compete but to complete 
Not to separate but to unite
And so fulfill your plan. 

Father, you did not create us to live alone 
and as male and female you created in us a longing 
A need to be unique and yet belong 
A need to love and give love 
And so fulfill your plan.

Father, your plan was made in the beginning 
That through giving and receiving love 
Men and women would continue the human race
And fill their own deepest longing 
To be one – with you – in love.   TR 1999
MYSTERY 
There's no greater mystery on earth than relationships.
The mist rising from a pond on a winter's morn….
A mirrored reflection in the calmness of the water…
These are natural phenomena, explained by science.
But the way that lovers daily mirror each other's lives,
the warming glow inside when the early morning rays of sunlight tickle your cheek.
Or the warming glow inside when a tiny hand grasps yours for support,
 or just to say, "I'm sorry dad,"
The mist rising in her eyes when she feels abandoned or joyful.
Are these explained by any other term
But soul talk, mystery, relationship - God in us?    TR

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

August 20.  Work.  The speaker kicked off with, “Equal work for equal pay,” is a popular slogan and goes to the heart of much of the gender question today in almost every sphere.  “But should there be discrimination about the type of work men and women can do?“ “Women cannot or would not necessarily want to do hard physical labour. Are we built differently physically and mentally to work differently too?” Many other important and relevant points were raised but once again the conclusion was that it had to do with balance and attitudes.  “It even starts at home with the way we teach our kids, boys and girls, about money and give them pocket money or expect them to contribute their time to making things work in the family.”  “And not necessarily in stereotypical ways” Robert added.  Everyone was encouraged to go and discuss the issue further with their children at home.

Scripture:    The kingdom of heaven is like a householder who went out early in the morning to hire labourers for his vineyard.  Matt 20:1-16. Pope Francis. Masculinity and femininity are not rigid categories A rigid approach turns into an over accentuation of the masculine and feminine and does not help children to appreciate genuine reciprocity. Taking on domestic chores or some aspects of raising children does not make a man any less masculine or imply failure, irresponsibility or shame.   AL 286.  JUBILEE:   The Lord has sent me to bring good news to the oppressed, to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and release to the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favour” ( Is 61:1-2). Jesus made those words his own at the beginning of his ministry, presenting himself as the fulfilment of the “year of the Lord’s favour” (cf. Lk 4:18-19).SNC 10.   Act and pray. For the needs of families of all kinds to grow in love and acceptance.